I know there is no where to hide.

I have only a few vices in my life, and the thing to note is that I am aware of them. Thus, being aware of them, they really don't work so well anymore as methods of emotional escape. When I indulge, I'm fully aware that I am indulging, but sometimes, you just have to allow for those moments of reprise. Give yourself a break from all the stress in the most guaranteed way.

What's my most guaranteed way? Sharing affection with my old lover. I was out of sorts today... a little broken hearted over Juan... a bit insecure about my attractiveness... and I sought out a kiss to help me put myself back together. Amazing how a soft, lingering, sensual kiss can do that for you. Loving is such a good, good thing.

I felt a little bit sad about it, because it signifies to me that I am moving on... I don't really want to be moving on... but the boy's only six months out of a 4 year relationship and he wants space... time... I understand, but there's that part of me that only hears that he doesn't want me. That little girl inside of me is just so tired of feeling unwanted.